I Will Remember You
I will remember you…
My friend Lisa died today. She collapsed while she was at work, and later died in the emergency room in Akron. My sister called me after work to let me know the news, but didn\’t know any more details.
…remember the good times that we had …
I met Lisa in high school – she dated my best friend Bill for a long time. She and I stayed friends even after the two of them broke up, and she introduced me to one of the seminal people in my life, Robin. The picture above is from a camping trip that the three of us took to western Pennsylvania, West Virginia (the picture is taken at a scenic overlook at Cooper\’s Rock, east of Morgantown), and Maryland. Ever since I got the news tonight, I\’ve been thinking back over the memories I have of Lisa:
- Her car pulling into my driveway for us to hang out one evening when I was back home, and she introducing me to this woman who worked with her, \”Robin\”. The three of us stayed out playing Frisbee and whatnot at Kent State until about 3 AM talking.
- Meeting Lisa, her sister Lori, and a few other friends after work up at Blossom Music Center for Lilith Fair. Lisa and I leaning on each other for support during \”Angel\”, and \”I Will Remember You.\” Lisa and I shared a deep love for Sarah McLachlan\’s music, so Lilith Fair was a great moment for us. I\’ve been listening to those songs again tonight.
- Driving home from the camping trip, hearing Lisa\’s blood-curdling scream at something I couldn\’t see. Starting to panic, she finished her scream with \”A Fashion Bug OUTLET STORE?!!?!?\”.
- Spending the Millenium New Year\’s Eve at her apartment with a few close friends. Dancing, drinking, and talking until the sun came up, just to make sure that it was Y2K compliant.
- Having her tell me, at Lilith Fair, that she was going on a date next week with a girl she meet at a coffee shop. And meeting her partner, Kathy, shortly thereafter. The two of them made a really cute couple. Robin tells me that Kathy\’s holding up pretty well through all of this – unfortunately, she\’s had practice since she\’s lost her father and brother already.
- All the impromptu parties at her parent\’s apartment – especially the games of Mal, Marcy getting too drunk to stick up her finger straight, and Lisa getting so drunk that she could call Robin a \”bitch\” without Robin getting upset.
- Going to the Columbus Art Fest one year with Lisa and Robin, and spying a photography booth with a very large picture full of camels on a rocky hillside. Commenting \”Marcus! I said no camels!\” and having Lisa collapse to the pavement laughing, cursing me because she\’d just said she needed to find a bathroom.
… weep not for the memories …
Lisa\’s the first of my friends from high school to die; in a way, I suppose I\’ve been lucky until now. I\’m not entirely sure how I\’m supposed to feel, if that makes any sense. She and I were very close for a number of years, but we hadn\’t spoken in any depth since I got married 3 years ago. Realistically, I\’m not sure how often I\’ll be making the trip back to Akron now that Carole and I have a son, and in the cold calculus of limited visits, I\’m not sure how often I would have seen her in the future.
I\’m sad, that much is certain – but its more a sadness for the time that I\’ve already missed. I certainly didn\’t mean to not talk to her again after the wedding, and I\’m sad that I didn\’t keep up that friendship more. On the other hand, there are always people coming and going into your life – and while we may always intend to keep in touch, often it doesn\’t happen.
Where I\’m at now, at least, is that I\’m sad that a person I still consider to be a friend is gone, and I hope that those around her are coping as best as possible through the shock of it all. I don\’t expect that there\’s much that I can do to help from this far away, but I\’d gladly do what I can. I definitely want to go to whatever memorial service is held.
I\’m very grateful to have been her friend, and to have shared so many good times with her.
… Iâm so tired but I canât sleep
Standinâ on the edge of something much too deep
Itâs funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we canât be heard …